Joanne Baum, PhD works with multi generation families to facilitate communication and understanding. Joanne helps families come to creative solutions that meet everybody’s needs.
The Sandwich Generation: Adults Caught Between Their Children and Their Older Parents
Joanne Baum, PhD offers a variety of services to older adults and their families. Joanne has expertise in individual and family therapy, mediation, communication skills, respectfully negotiating differences, and collaboration towards a solution that meets everyone’s needs. Joanne received a National Institute on Aging Fellowship during her PhD studies in the 1970s. She studied aging, life span development, multi generation families, life span education, and widowhood.
Younger old age and older old age ought to be a time to celebrate life, to share wisdom, and to have close respectful relationships with extended family. Too often, this stage is marked by each generation becoming increasingly “positional.” Each generation is sure they know what is right for themselves and their older and younger family members. They stop really listening to each other. They hear the words, but mostly in an attempt to use that person’s words and thoughts to convince the other person they are right. Discussions can become emotionally painful “arguments.” The stakes are high – “Can mom drive safely?” “Isn’t it time for dad to move from the apartment?” “How do we convince mom and dad it’s time to give up their house?” “Why won’t mom take better care of herself?” “How do we convince dad he needs some help in the house…?”
Are You Struggling With These Issues?
- Family Time is so Stressful
- I can’t seem to talk to her/him anymore
- I just can’t accept my mom’s perspective
- My parent thinks I don’t understand
- We’re talking but no understanding is going on
- Life Transitions
- Caught between my parents and my kids
- What happened to my Personal Boundaries
- How do you take care of Themand take care of Yourself too?
- Maintaining independence and getting the help you need
- Exploring alternative housing options
- Helping families navigate major medical problems/disabilities
- Substance Abuse Issues
- Grief work
- End of Life Issues
- Are you having trouble respecting your parents’ wishes when you think you know better?
- Are you challenged by your children’s decisions when you’re sure you have a better idea?
Often, a family needs a caring intermediary to get two or more generations to listen and respect each other’s perspective rather than trying so hard to convince the other generation of their “rightness.”